*sigh* i dunno. i didnt notice this b4, but it seems like every1 is hooked up. i guess i didnt realize it b4 b/c i'm stuck in my own lil stephanie world, where all i do is study all day, and my friends are not really hooked up. therefore, i dont see this. i guess it's actually no big deal. i dont mind that much. kinda suprising, tho. i guess it's expected. weird. makes me a bit depressed tho. i realized, yea. stephanie's gonna get NO PLAY for the next 4 years. i know what u're thinking. summer! u can get it then. uhhh...no. stuck in a indian town where i know no 1... that'll b GREAT. so most definitely, no play. maybe i should lower my standards or morals a bit. then, i might actually b able to LIKE some1. am i asking 2 much? am i asking more than what a normal girl does? i guess i want 2 find some1, kinda like me in a sense. i like to party and have fun, i like to bum and chill, and i'm a nerd. so basically my ideal guy is some intelligent goofy semi-awkward non-smoking non-druggie not-a-big drinker (somewhat tall ;) ) nerdy guy that likes to party and act stupid w/ me, but can also just sit and bum around and have just as much fun. u would think out of 5000 undergrads, this could b found. but it hasnt happened YET. i'm not feeling that's it's going 2 either. at first (i talked w/ ann about this), i think it was more like i MADE myself find some type of interest SOMEWHERE, b/c it makes like alittle more amusing. it's a bit entertaining. now, i'm even 2 lazy 4 that. *sigh* really! i wanna know. am i asking 2 much? i sound a bit bitter. i think i am. i want something...i dunno. special. i guess i'm jealous of what i see around me. *sigh*
i guess these blogs tend to do a lot w/ academics and the lack of boys @ this school. academic wise, yea. let's still not talk about that. i just wanna state now that my w. hist. ta is a biatch. ARGH let's not get me started on this. OK. we're not gonna talk about this.
i've been thinking a lot about different stuff lately, i just never have time 2 write this down in here, and now i dont remember any more. if i cant remember it cant b that important, right.
o man, on another note, i just wanna say, i'm a bit disappointed. lately, i've been hearing about a lot of ppl who are...i dunno how 2 say it. doing things they said they'd never do. it's a bit weird 4 me, i'm a big shocked. i'm also shocked about hearing stuff about ppl here that i didnt know b4. a different perspective, stuff i didnt know. again, i'm kinda shut off in my own lil stephanie world. what the heck is IN stephanie world? i cant even say. it doesnt consist of much.
o. i do wanna say that 1 of my yummy delicious friends PATRICK is so incredibly kool. yummy? delicious? i think i'm delirious. hahaha. anywayz, he's kool. me and him, man. all the way. i always feel like i can talk 2 him about anything. since kindergarten. he's like my brother. he's always watching out 4 me, and giving me advice. i know his own life isnt perfect, but he tries so hard 2 make mine that way. i havent really felt that "best friend" connection w/ any1 here yet. i mean, i've bonded w/ ppl. but not that...bond. that bond! i'm sure u know what i'm talking about that something u feel when u know u click w/ the person, and u guys get along and u trust each other and...i dunno! the best friend bond! ppl say that it'l change and that your college friends will eventually become your best friends. i'm not seeing that yet, and i'm 1/4 thru my school year already. there's no place like home, right? it gets a bit lonely sometimes. did i talk about the homesick feeling i had the other day? man, i'm switching topics fast. w/e, that's the way i usually talk anywayz, right? if u know me, u kno that's the way i am. :)
yea, matt randomly imed me, and i talked 2 him for like 5 minutes about pretty much nothing. and he had 2 go 2 class. and all of a sudden, i had this wave wash over me. when's the next time i'm gonna see him? he was away @ ut all summer. so the last day of school was the last day i saw him. what about all those friends that i kinda keep in touch w/ but not on a constant basis? what about them? am i ever gonna see them again? suppose i DO go back 2 houston 4 maybe a week or 2. i cant see EVERY1 in that small time span. and what if i go back @ a time where my friend's arent gonna b there? there's a chance i might never see some of them again. i do keep in touch w/ a few on a inbetween daily/weekly basis. then there's my baby JESSICA, who i dont talk 2 that much, but she'll always b my best friend cuz we click right. i love my friends from home, and u guys, i miss yall like crazy! that 1 day, i just had a lil homesickness. no1's ever gonna come visit pittsburgh. this city sux man. but in the summer, if u go 2 jersey or ny, if u dont tell me and i found out, OO u wont b a happy camper.
hm...this was a semi-depressing blog. i dont think u really wanna hear about my weekend, cuz i didnt do much. altho i'm realy gonna try working on the fatness situation. i'm getting so TUBBY! me and my roommate are gonna do this 15 minute circuit thing 3 times a week. yea...in the magazine it looked all ez. when we started, like 1 minute into it, we were both DYING. it's all good. we'll encourage each other. plus, we have all those friggin APPLES from the farm we visited. yummy apples! i'm gonna eat a lot of em, and be healthy. YEA! if any1 wants apples, stop by my room! the meal block is retarded here...grr. dont get me started on that either. alright, i'm like soooo tired now, i'm gonna go 2 bed. nite!